I Need Motivation!

Hello ladies,

Our wedding is forever away (literally - 2012) but I am on a bit of a weight loss mission anyway. I feel horrendous at the moment and am pretty miserable with how I look.

You'd think that would be enough of a motivation for me to do something about it, but apparently not! I can go periods of being really good and having steady, healthy weight loss and then outrageous periods of complete lack of self-control. After saying a couple of weeks ago that I wanted to lose half a stone by my birthday (end of July) I have put 3 pounds on in 10 days!!! Granted, we ate out a few times because of various events, but that is ridiculous. I also couldn't go to the gym for a couple of weeks because of the bloody flu, but then you get out of the habit and it makes it seem bigger and scarier than it did before!

I don't have the motivation of wedding dress fittings at the moment, but I want to be able to reach a good weight and maintain it, so that when the time comes it's less of a chore. Someone give me some motivational tips.... PLEASE!!! xxx

 

Hello!

I can completely understand the lack of motivation. I too am a 2012 bride2be and am really struggling with the weight issue. I have lots and lots to lose to be an optimum weight and whilst I had done really well, it's stabilised and not hifting and I became lazy etc and the pattern of self-loathing kicks in time and time again.

My ideas for motivation are:

Don't set specific targets if you are not a target orientated person. Instead try to reward yourself each time you choose an alternative to whatever you would normally eat. This may be as simple as sitting in the garden and ignoring the housework for 30 mins, going window shopping at lunchtime or painting your nails.

Personally, I am rubbish at pampering myself as I don't like my body and I compare myself a lot to others who I feel look nicer and better than me. This is a lethal trap. If you are similar then you can start to treat yourself. No matter what your size you are loved and getting married and therefore must be beautiful as a person mentally and physically. Thi is hard to digest for someone that doesn't like their body but it' true.

You can go an look in a mirror and point out to yourself all the bits you dislike then remind yourself that your wonderful man loves everything about you including those bits. Acceptance is part of motivation because without realising your loved and liked as you are, you may punish yourself with food which leads to the cycle of apathy.

I'm not an expert but I have lost a lot of weight and still have loads to go and am making observations based on what works for me. I have to take my own advice really! I'm going to keep a treat diary and write on what I do that makes me feel less frumpy and fat and more beautiful and girlie Perception is everything.

 

Hey hunny bunny!

First tip...ditch the scales, that 3lbs could've been anything from water weight, muscle pre-period bloat or just fat gain, anyway it's bloody depressing!!
Instead of using the scales, use a tape measure, it's a bit more accurate when it comes to measuring how effective whatever you've been doing is.
If you must weigh yourself, do it once/twice a month about a week after your period (I don't know about you, but I put on between 3-8lbs the week before each period, no matter how good I've been).
I measure my upper arms, bust, waist, hips & individual thighs every Monday (I do it on a monday, as the weekend is normally my cheat days)!
If you need motivation, I'm happy to do a weekly/fortnightly compare thingy *anyone else who wants to do it, lemme know, and I'll start a thread*

If you've not done already, swap everyday things for the lower calorie option; no sugar in your tea, skimmed milk instead of full fat, if you love coffee just have a regular white/black instead of a latte, if you do drink make sure it's low cal (as alcohol is useless anyway) like a vodka & diet coke (normally around 56cal a glass!)... You'll be surprised at how much the little things make a difference (espcially as you've got a while till the Big Day).

Don't rely on the Gym as your only place to work out....like you've said, it's easy to get out of habit & when you're feeling like a blimp it's almost impossible to motivate yourself (also I feel like a prat at the gym!). We've (as people, not you & me!) been programmed to think that going to the gym is the ONLY way to get fit (I've not been to the gym in a year, but in that time I've lost half a stone!) instead buy something you can use at home;
.If you watch tv by yourself alot (I do hubby works shifts) buy a trampette...that way you can bounce without annoying anyone (not recommend in a flat, after about 8pm..neighbours don't likey)!
.If you've got a garden or lovely high celings buy a skipping rope...skipping, like bouncing is really REALLY effective at burning cals etc.
.Buy a workout dvd, that way you've got a set time (be it 15 or 30 mins) you HAVE to work out in (I recommend Rosemary Conley's Ultimate Body Workout, the main section is easy to follow, has some half decent old pop songs (Deeper Shade of Blue by STEPS!! etc)...it's got a section of chair workouts (for old/preggers people) so if you're feeling crap you can still workout.
.If you've got the space, get a Swiss Ball or a small weight set (or even both!)....have a look on t'ternet for lady workouts (little lady weights have been awesome for toning my bingo wings).
Another thing....Go Shopping!! Walking is good for you, and if you go into shops & see lovely clothes (DON'T BUY THEM ALL!!) you'll feel more motivated! I go to Bluewater 2/3 times a month, just for a look & a toddle.

Go onto a site like Livestrong.com...they've got an AWESOME diet section, with a daily food/drink/exercise log so you can compare how much you're taking on compared to how much you're burning.
They also have a calorie calculator..you put in your current weight, exercise level etc..and they work out how many cals you need to eat in order to do whatever it is you want to do (loose 1,2,3 etc lbs a week, gain weight).

Cheat days are your friend!!! Imbrace one or two days a week (I'd suggest one atm, as you wanted to loose weight by the end of the month) where anything goes (up to about 2000cals), on my cheat days I normally eat a FOUR PACKET of Fresh cream Eclairs, YUMMY!!!! Cheat days will help motivate you to not eat bad stuff during the week.

Have 5-6 small meals a day, make breakfast count and don't graze whilst watching tv or working....if you've got a bag of biscuits on your desk/sofa you're more likely to eat more of them without realising it..as your mind is elsewhere.
If you are going out for a meal, and it's not been prearranged what you're eating, have a (low cal, you'd be surprised how many have high cal content) cuppa soup before you leave the house....it fills you up, and you're less likely to be hungry! What I do, if it's a 3 course meal..I don't have a starter.


My god, I can ramble on a bit?! Hope you find something useful in my wordy bits!! good luck xx

 

And Poppleminster made a good point (again! That woman's full of them!)....if you're not going to be motivated by targets, stuff targets are a great idea...
When I lose 3 more inches from my tummy Hubby is taking me dress shopping

 

oooh that livestrong site looks cool! I will carefully read it whilst hiding the bar of dairy milk that was my breakfast

I'm terrible, it was left in the lounge last night half eaten so I finished it off for breakfast. I soooo lack self control! This is where normally I would punish myself for eating it by being rubbish for the rest of the day but today I am attempting to feel better by reading that site. If I manage to the end of the day then I will be a happy bunny

Scales freak me out as I got a weight watchers set that was all singing all dancing but it gave 4 different readings in a row, it was a nightmare and i've not replaced it. I cannot cope with targets as I set myself up to fail if I do because I get so upset if I don't achieve what I wanted then eat nice things to feel better and as confirmation I am a failure.

The psychology of weight control is complex and even when you're aware of it, it's tough. We'll get there though

 

Yeah, the myplate bit on it is so helpful.

I'm the same as you Poppleminster...If I open a packet of biscuts, I have to eat the whole pack..even taking them out the room doesn't stop me wanting to eat them, same with chocolate...it's so frustrating.
xx

 

Ok, so for once I think I've taken on board the stuff I've read, so thankyou!

My biggest problem is that if I eat something naughty, I then get this 'that's blown it' attitude and then eat ridiculously the rest of the day. Silly!

Relaxing about what I weigh and look like will probably do the world of good.

 

yay glad you are feeling ok. We're always here for support / a good giggle when needed.