Error.
Hi and Welcome. I do feel your anger Levers. To not let you girls know what the hen do plans are, especially the cost. Obviously it never cross her mind of other peoples circumstances. Your party offered to pay for your part which is thoughtful of them but your cousin has arranged it how and what she wants whether people like it or not which is unbelieveable! What shocked me most is the cost is divide up at you and others expense but her, seems very self-centered and very unfair to others. I would never in a million years to get my girls to pay my part. As it's quite close to the wedding, so after the wedding would you have a talk with her asking why she made these decision and not thought about if people are prepared to pay for her as well. With the makeup, groom's suit seems fine to me, but with thousands of designs you can do on a invite and to choose the same as a relative's, there's no excuse for her that it's just a coincidence! there's no coincidence from font, colour and style.
Bloomin heck! £50 for a meal.. What will you be eating!!!! I went to a hen do once, and I wasn't drinking. Basically the brides sister just said lets split the bill, some people had had starters and extras and a fair few wines and I had had a pizza and a diet coke! When one of the people said, oh but I have had a lot more the sister said oh don't worry let's just split! It cost me £30 and I was not impressed! wasn't an expensive restuarant either! At my good friends recent hen do, there were 3 of us pregnant so not drinking. We all split the meal cost, but to be honest we had alcohol free cocktails which were just as expensive and everyone was fair. then in the eve, the drinkers had a drink kity and the non drinkers had their own. As for the bride, we paid for her activity ( dancing) and the non drinkers put a bit in the drinkers kity to buy her a drink so she didn't have to pay all eve! My own hen do, no one knew what was happening not even me. Everyone put in £50 but had a limo for the night, club entry and champagne/ drinks on the way! I wasn't expected to put in but was told that ( I offered as was worried about the cost for everyone else) Not much that can be done now, but I expect that other people may feel same as you and be a bit hacked off at paying £50 for a meal! As for the other issues, you could see it as a bit of a compliment. My friend had very very similar flowers to me, she told me before that she loved my flowers so wanted similar. I thought it was lovely. And to be honest I had aspects of other peoples wedding at my own, I went to the venue and saw how a bride had made bunting so made some. Choosing the same suit and make up is prob just because she liked yrs. the invites is a bit wierd but to be honest I wouldn't worry, you got married first so when family receive the invites they will think its strange and be asking questions but about her!
Oh and welcome to forums. Bit confused though, your profile has wedding date 2014 but you say yr already married?
I think you are fully justified in being angry! She has behaved very selfishly. I can kind of understand her not inviting your Mum though - clearly she has not treated her very well and I hope that she does something to say thank you for the help, but an invite the hen do isn't necessarily the way to do it. I would hope she will give your Mum a little pressie or even just a thank you card on the wedding day... from what you've said about her though I wouldn't hold my breath!! She sounds awful. Is she worth the hassle? Does your friendship go back a long way? If not then I'd be tempted to get rid of this toxic friend. How did the hen do go by the way?
