Choosing A Wedding Venue :\

Discussion in 'Venue, Ceremony and Reception' started by rainbowbride, Jul 28, 2010.

  1. rainbowbride

    rainbowbride

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    Hello lovely people
    I am hoping you can help me here. We've been looking at a few venues now, and where we live in Surrey everything is parlously expensive. Also it's been complicated too, because we want our main and actual wedding to take place at Stonehenge - with a follow up legal wedding after. We were originally thinking about it on 2 different occasions, as well, Stonehenge is nowhere near Surrey! But this of course suggested complications and expense and...argh!

    So, as my fiance wasn't looking vastly impressed with any of the places I had suggested, I whimsically suggested: http://www.orchardleigh.net/
    Which had some astoundingly good last minute deals on, and so today we ran down before he started work at 4pm to view it.
    Well. It's amazing. I had the Worst case of house envy I have ever had. But I can't seem to get up enthusiasm (possibly cos I've driven 4 hours on v. little food today, and also my car might be broken...), so I thought I'd come on here and list pros and cons and get some feedback.

    Pros:
    - Utterly amazing, amazing place. I want to LIVE there
    - Means we can fabulously combine stonehenge with a legal wedding on the same day
    - Technically quite affordable

    Cons:
    - Currently we can't afford Anything, and whilst I suppose it is quite feasible to borrow what we could reasonably expect to earn once I actually GET a full time job (I get lots of interviews, no jobs yet) the whole concept of agreeing to pay out several £k of money to someone when currently I am selling things to finish paying for fiance's engagement ring really stresses me :D
    - Because it's someone's house you only get it for the day you pay for. As it's the house I really love and adore, I want to stay there for more than 1 day, I realllllllllly do. I had a happy image of us getting it for Saturday and getting ready for the wedding and spending time with friends, and then Sunday being wedding day - and possibly booking Monday for a 'us having an amazing time in an amazing house' day. But no, it would be in any time after 9am and out by 11am the next day and that's it! :D You can't even go stay a night as an anniversary thing! :D They have lodges but...it's not the same :D

    I don't know. I don't feel insanely keen and desperate to book, but as I say I have huge money anxiety and also my car might be broken - and I just drove 4 hours! So maybe I will in the morning. I don't know. Any opinions welcome, Please! Although I'm also desperately hoping you don't all go 'ooh that's nice' and promptly book all the dates we might want :lol:

    I feel this is also a good time to say we really do intend to get married in the Spring. I don't want to wait and if we really can't afford anything we'll just turn up at a register office to sign papers and pay to go to stonehenge with a couple of nice outfits, some rings and some flowers. But yeah. I don't know...I do wonder if my enthusiasm would return if I could just get a full-time job...

    Thank you
     
    rainbowbride, Jul 28, 2010
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  2. rainbowbride

    Mrsg2b2011

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    Bless you huuny I honestly hope something comes up for you very soon job wise! x

    The house is gorgeous!! Very very pretty & the deals they are doing are fab!!! Can understand whay you are feeling a bit dispirited if you are having problems with your car & getting a job. What did your h2b think of the house? Did he like it? If so think you should sit down together & chat about it as he may have some pros & cons aswell but when you sit down & discuss it, it can fire up some of the ecitement & you will know deep down if you want to get married there.
    Godd luck with what you decide hun, sorry i haven't helped much but really hope you sort it soon xxx
     
    Mrsg2b2011, Jul 28, 2010
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  3. rainbowbride

    rainbowbride

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    He loves it :eek: I think I'd be happier if we could stay longer and go back for anniversaries. Must work out how to make friends with the man who owns it.
    That does help and thank you. I wonder if anyone on here has borrowed money for a wedding. It's what we'll Have to do unless we want to wait years (which we empathically don't) but omg it's terrifying :(
     
    rainbowbride, Jul 28, 2010
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  4. rainbowbride

    MrsC2Be

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    Firstly, I was made redundant in november 2008 (right before christmas, cheers guys) and was out of work for a while, so I understand your frustrations at lack of job. You WILL find something and it will all be fine, it might take time, but you will get there.

    Secondly, I bet there are many places you can't go back to celebrate anniversaries as such, we probably won't be able to. But you'd be able to go back to stonehenge and celebrate where you actually got married, which sounds fab by the way.

    We're against borrowing for our wedding and are therefore saving and have set a date for over 2 years away, however, I get frustrated with having to wait, so understand why you don't want to. Could you compromise and put it off til the following september (weather will still be good) or the following spring and meet halfway with saving and borrowing?

    You'll get sorted and it'll all come good xx
     
    MrsC2Be, Jul 28, 2010
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  5. rainbowbride

    Helen

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    I was made redundant on 24th December last year and I've not even managed to get an interview yet :rolleyes: so I can relate to your fustration.

    Your venue looks gorgeous :) I know you said you wanted to be able to return for special occasions, the lodges look really rather sweet and I'm sure you would still enjoy staying there. Maybe you can visit the venue again when you are not so tired and in a different frame of mind. If you really aren't keen then keep on looking and I'm sure you will soon find a venue you love :)
     
    Helen, Jul 29, 2010
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  6. rainbowbride

    Becky

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    That venue does look incredible, but you seem to have some serious doubts about it. It sounds like borrowing money would made you very uncomfortable, so it's probably not worth overstretching yourself if possible. How long would it take to save for it? Might be worth making a compromise - as suggested above, maybe put it off for a little while to give you time.

    Sorry that's probably not what you wanted to hear hon!

    If you are keen to get married sooner rather than later, why not just have the simple ceremony you mentioned at the end of your post? It doesn't need to cost a fortune to have an amazing day :)
     
    Becky, Jul 29, 2010
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  7. rainbowbride

    poppleminster

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    Have you seen Wotton House which I think is near you? Another gorgeous house but cheaper I think :)

    Wotton House

    Apologies if this is no use, it's just similar and I think in the area close to you.

    :D
     
    poppleminster, Jul 29, 2010
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  8. rainbowbride

    rainbowbride

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    @poppleminster - we actually saw Wotton House second of any - but it's terrible! :\ And a million miles more expensive :) And aside from the horrible carpets and utter lack of sex appeal (imo) it has little advertising tables in all the corners for 'ooh have your wedding here' or 'ooh come here for Christmas'. And some poor woman was having her wedding reception there an hour later so I don't think they even get taken out! :D That said, of course thankyou SO much for looking and suggesting! :rolleyes:

    Tbh I do really like the place and I've had a think today and worked out a plan where we could stay in a B&B much closer to Stonehenge the night before, and go out with people for chinese. Which does all sound rather nice so I think we might go with borrow some money whilst I pursue every job I can. All fingers crossed! :)
     
    rainbowbride, Jul 29, 2010
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  9. rainbowbride

    FlowerCo

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    Hi Rainbow bride,

    I dont think you are alone in borrowing money for your wedding, I guess you need to be happy that you can afford to pay it back with out bringing money stresses into married life with you.

    Life in general I think is a juggle these days, I know I never seem to stop trying to ballance the books! (failing most of the time!)

    I love Orchardleigh, but am a Bath girl so a little bias! there are loads of lovely and inexpensive places to stay in the area.
    Good luck with your decisions!

    Zoe xxx
     
    FlowerCo, Jul 30, 2010
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  10. rainbowbride

    rainbowbride

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    @FlowerCo - thank you. I think that's actually helpful, I do want some reassurance that other people do borrow money for their weddings - and that's it not just us being silly and irresponsible of attitude or something.
    Thankyou!
     
    rainbowbride, Aug 1, 2010
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  11. rainbowbride

    Frogbitch

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    We borrowed all the money for our wedding.
    I was lucky enough to have so much equity in my house that I consolidated my debts, paid for the wedding and still ended up paying out less every month.
    Having said that, we still don't seem to have much money on a day to day basis.
    It feels weird spending loads on dresses and cakes, when there's no food in the house, but I don't regret it for a second.
     
    Frogbitch, Aug 1, 2010
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